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 April 24th is Armenian Genocide Remembrance Day. 

This year this date is also Orthodox Easter Day. 

On Wednesday, I visited my friend Pete Najarian to bring him a copy of Bob’s Black Lives, White Lives. Pete is a writer and artist. His mother Zaroohe Najarian is the “star” of my film I Will Not Be Sad In This World (2001). It’s been a while, so when catching up on things, we also talk about Zaroohe. Pete shows me a copy of his last drawing of her, the only one made with an ink pen. Usually he draws her with a pencil when visiting the nursing home. This last time she is far away already, and a few days later on March 15, 2006, she dies at age 101. For her funeral, I drive with Pete to Fresno. 


Drawing of Zaroohe by Pete Najarian, published in his book “The Artist and His Mother” 

“I'm not going to be sad, I make myself happy,“ she declares in my film. For its title, I chose an old Armenian folk song: I will not be sad in this world. Zaroohe is still with me. All over my home, a few of Pete’s paintings of her are hanging, as well as photos I had taken of her. She was an earthy, beautiful, unique, strong woman, even in her old age. So grateful I got to experience her in the last 9 years of her long life, and was able to drink in her salt of the earth wisdom, and pass her story on with my film. Zaroohe lives on in many ways…. 


“A touching and evocative film – having the children recreate Zaroohe’s story is particularly effective. Congratulations!”  –Atom Egoyan, Canadian filmmaker
 
The main theme of my intimate portrait of Zaroohe in old age is the desire for knowing our elders’ stories and memories, and the illusive act of remembering. 
https://karinafilms.vhx.tv/products/i-will-not-be-sad-in-this-world-2001-56-minutes 

Comments

  1. Alex KApril 28, 2022 at 5:27 PM

    Reading your entry, there is such a feeling of tenderness that arises. It moves me deeply and has me reflecting on my mother who like Zaroohe lived through war and loss. My mother was quite sad and anxious in her life unlike Zaroohe. She was not willing to talk much about those years nor did I show very much interest. This is a source of pain for me. Yet how you treat her and hold her with quiet beauty and unassuming respect acts like a salve on my heart.

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  2. KarinaApril 28, 2022 at 9:14 PM

    Today is Holocaust Remembrance Day. You saw my film I Will Not Be Sad In This World – it was made for all those affected by genocide, including the children of Holocaust survivors. This is the tragedy of war: all will suffer for generations to come... It's a heavy weight. Maybe watch the film again, listen to the music, the shards of memories, Peter the son asking frenetic questions about details of his grandmother's face which appeared to Zaroohe in a dream for the first time in her life the week before... having been ripped from her mother on the Death March at a young age, she could not remember her face. That scene is at the core of the film and asks us to ponder loss, gently....

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  3. Alex KApril 29, 2022 at 8:10 PM

    After my comment and then reading your reply, I just watched the film again after many years. Wow! So beautiful and masterful! I was moved throughout. I feel I took another step in understanding and appreciating with my heart my mother and life. As the film so beautifully conveys: to allow and let in as best one can what is true-god lives in that.

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